(originally written just before Christmas 2008, but the advice stands…)
T’is the season to be panicked. Stressed out. Pressured. Guilt-ridden and filled with anxiety. Even depressed. You may avoid friends and relatives, worry that you are spending too much or too little on gifts, fret that you are not meeting every single expectation of the holiday season. Is there enough drape to that garland? Are there too many lights on that reindeer atop the garage?? Did I remember to put an absorbent pad under the tree stand??? I’m scheduled to go to How Many Parties????

Shhhh. Be calm. Take a moment and stop.

For some people, good moods are not automatic. In fact, for some they’re a lot of work. Don’t let the fact that you find yourself slipping away from a good mood throw you for a loop. Accept the fact that you’re stressed, primed for panic, and try a few of these tricks to realign your outlook.

Hum
Yep. Hum softly to yourself. Pick a good tune from your past and hum it aloud, so your ears can enjoy it too. Give it a few minutes to take effect; repeat as necessary to derail the stressed-out feelings.

Sing.
Like humming, only your mind has to work to remember the words. Even if you pick a song you know by heart, there’s a part of your brain that has to process what it thinks you want your voice to do.

Cave.
(but not without a timer) Get totally serious about this frantic condition, buckle down and throw yourself a Pity Party. Spend 15-20 minutes on light stress conditions; go all out with an hour-long festival for the really aggravating panic attacks. Quite effective when performed with a small group; egg each other on toward the light at the end of the frantic tunnel.

Forgive.
Forgive each and every one of your ancestors for setting you up with these traditions of gifting and gathering, cooking and entertaining, shopping and stressing. Reminisce on the good old days when there was only one store within a day’s buggy ride, and most gifts were handmade anyway. Then forgive yourself for being human and finding all this stuff a bit daunting and off-putting.

Do Less.
Just remember to smile (to yourself, if need be) as you shake your head apologetically at the invitation to that fifteenth Yuletide gathering. You can’t be in two places at once, and being in a calm quiet spot all by yourself without tons of merriment bouncing off your head does count as a place.

Expect Less
Dial down the anticipation level from ten gifts to two, from five holiday bashes to two quiet gatherings, from 30 batches of home-made fruitcake to a deftly served platter of bakery-made delights. Step past the unreasonable expectations – buying cookies instead of making them does not mean you love your kids less.

Help Someone Else
When your attention is turned toward the needs of someone else, and your energy is being poured into helping them, your mood may swing upward.

Whatever your method, please have a happy, peaceful, light-hearted, light-spirited holiday.